Hopelessly Aimless Yet Significantly Overwhelmed
How do you feel nothing and everything all at once? This is my day-to-day. Too many things to do, not enough brain cells left to do them. Too little fucks left to give. There's a hopelessness going on in my brain - like what's the point of any of it? It's like looking at these mountains and knowing I can't just go TOUCH them, even though I guess I'd like nothing more than to go sit somewhere in the middle and just be swallowed up. This isn't "Man's struggle for meaning" or Woman's ... because in my brain, there doesn't seem to be any meaning anymore. We're all just cogs in a machine we can't see - trees in the forest. Part of the collective. I see the hawk land on my fence, yet if I get up to touch it, it will just fly away. Story of my life, right? I reach out, rejection ensues. I live to serve, only, and the second it's me that needs something, I am all things selfish, self absorbed, and overdramatic. Maybe I suck at comm...